Review Number 3

Author : ChristAineXtine
Title : No Way Out
Link : http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/CX_08/
Status : Completed
Reviewer : Fahrenheit_love @ timeless-memories.co.nr
Title: 4/5
The title fits perfectly! Very well thought out… But it’s somewhat common…

Forewords: 8/10
It was very interesting! Your forewords made me want to read on. But, I feel like you gave away too much information; like your forewords was a mini summary of your story.

Plot: 17/20
Your plot was unique. It broke my heart to see Chun-Ella Split up!  But, the ending was very unique… Her getting raped by her own husband… wow. It was nice you told the flashback of how Wu Chun and Ella met in the café…

Originality: 8/10
I said above that your story is unique; it is! But the whole break up, move on, be friends thing is very common in a fanfic. But, like I said, the fact that she got raped by Baron in the end and could do nothing about it was different.

Style of Writing: 13/15
Your style of writing is very common; a lot of people write like this… but I think you should have used different structure for your writing. If you don’t understand what I mean, here is an example:

“Chun felt sorry for his self. He felt confused on what he did that made her say those words.”
Instead you could have said- “Chun felt sorry for himself; feeling confused of what he did that would make her say those words.”

Spelling, Grammar, and Punctuation: 12/15
Nothing too wrong with your story; a few grammar mistakes here and there, a couple of spelling mistakes, ect… It seemed like maybe you were in a hurry to type and didn’t proof-read. Proof reading is very important. For instance, you called Ella, he, a couple of times and Baron, she; there were a few grammar mistakes like:
“Well, she was used to that because he never did give him any company for a lot of days already.”
It should be: “Well, she was used that since he never did give HER any company for MANY days already.”
And there were times you missed the commas and periods and quotation marks. Again, proof-reading would fix that.

Descriptions and Word Choice: 8/10
I could feel the pain and the heartache. You did a very good job describing things… but your word choice was nothing impressive. It was very common. I suggest a thesaurus maybe?

Appearance: 10/10
I really like your poster and background! No complaints!

Creativity and Bonus: 4/5
I enjoyed your story very much. It was unique and interesting. Good job! Also, I love Chunella- even though they didn’t end up together…! Keep up the good work!

Total: 84/100